Marco Andolfi's Blog: Funny

In my job, I have the opportunity of watching how people think.
I believe that a piece of code is a great demonstration about the cognitive skills of a person.

The question of the picture above says a lot... BeastUK "problem solving" skills are quite limited.

During my profession, I have to instruct developers about what is needed to do and review also their code.
Here is a short collection about the most stupid piece of code I have ever seen (believe me, it is real!).

Of course, this code has been re-adapted and made anonymous.
Anyway, I wanted to add some information about the origin of the genius, therefore you'll find below the flag of the creator's homecountry.

Some of these sniplets come from my former colleagues, freelancers, certified experts, colleagues from my customers, developers with several years of experience.

Top. 10

Ok, let's say that was a too fast copy and paste...

 […]  
     person.setFirstName(salutation);  
     person.setLastName(firstName);  
     person.setSalutation(lastName);  
 […]

Top. 9

What about one loop and inside 5 if ?

 for i in my_array loop  
      if (my_array(i) == 1) then  
           -- do something  
      end if;  
 end loop;  
 for i in my_array loop  
      if (my_array(i) == 2) then  
           -- do something  
      end if;  
 end loop;  
 for i in my_array loop  
      if (my_array(i) == 3) then  
           -- do something  
      end if;  
 end loop;  
 for i in my_array loop  
      if (my_array(i) == 4) then  
           -- do something  
      end if;  
 end loop;  
 for i in my_array loop  
      if (my_array(i) == 5) then  
           -- do something  
      end if;  
 end loop;

Top. 8

Unfortunately I did not have the honor to work with this genious.

I had to adapt the code in order to obfuscate confidential content of course, but the result was the same...

Given the following table:

 create table myTable (
 a numeric, 
 b numeric, 
 c numeric 
);

We found in the code the following select:

select a 
from mytable
where b = (
 select b 
 from mytable 
 where c = param
)

Difficult to understand? Why do you need a sub query? why not to put it directly in the where condition?
Since it is exactly the same result, try to read it in this form:

select a
from mytable 
where c = param

Top. 7

Some confusion with the group by...

Some genious of previous masterpiece. I also in this case I have obfuscated the code.

Given the same table of before:

create table myTable (
 a numeric, 
 b numeric, 
 c numeric 
);

We found in the code the following select:

select a, b, sum(c) 
from   (
 select a, b, sum(c) as c 
 from mytable 
 group by a, b
)
group by a, b

The second group by (the external, the surrounding one) is totally useless. It makes the sum of a single record... Let's see a simplified version...

select a, b, sum(c) as c 
from mytable 
group by a, b

Top. 6

This one left me totally attonished!!!

Found in the code:

select max(id) 
into lmaxid 
from log_messages;

delete from log_messages 
where id <= lmaxid;

Why should I select from the max and delete everything lower than max… therefore I delete everything?!?!

there is nothing behind max…

delete from log_messages;

Top. 5

HOW THE HELL A SELECT COUNT CAN RETURN NO RECORD!!!!

In any case it returns one line with a number, mostly it will be 0!!!!

Found in the code:

DECLARE
  v_cnt numeric;
  param numeric;
BEGIN
  BEGIN
    SELECT COUNT(1)
    INTO v_cnt
    FROM my_table
    WHERE field_1 = param;
  EXCEPTION
    WHEN NO_DATA_FOUND THEN
     //do something else
  END;
END;

Top. 4

What does it do the NVL function in Oracle?

Let's say:

NVL(a,b)

- If a is not null then it returns the value of a.

- If the a is a NULL value then it returns the value of b.

Tipically used in select statement in order to overwrite possible NULL values coming from the table.

Given the same table of before:

create table myTable (
 a numeric, 
 b numeric, 
 c numeric 
);

Found in the code:

select
   nvl('a', a), 
   nvl('b', b), 
   nvl('c', c)
from dual;

How can it be possible that a constant value (like 'a') can be NULL?
Is it now more clear?

select 
   'a', 'b', 'c'
from dual;

Top. 3

How to make your life more complicated...
Look at this piece of code and try to understand what is doing.

 select   
      case when count(*) > 0   
           then count(*)   
           else 0   
      end   
 from table

I am kind of sure you still do not get it... Try to see the version below, it is absolutely equivalent:

 select   
      count(*)  
 from table

Top. 2 (Log, part 1)

Topic: Storing queries in the log
Instructions about task:

Me: Hi Dev, I saw that you are using static code. Actually for this project has been decided to use dynamic code. In particular we need to store the EXACT query that has been executed! Including the parameters used in queries.
Therefore we make the query dynamic into a variable, save the variable in the log table and then execute the variable.
Dev: Ok, all clear, now make sense! So store the query in the log!

Expectation:

 procedure myProcedure() begin  
      [...]  
      v_sql := 'insert into myTable   
                     select * from mySource  
                     where parameter = ' || var;  
      insert_in_log(v_sql);  
      execute v_sql;  
      [...]  
 end;

Here is what I got:

 procedure myProcedure() begin  
      [...]  
      insert into myTable   
      select * from mySource  
      where parameter = var;  
      
      v_sql := 'insert into myTable   
                     select * from mySource  
                     where parameter = <<parameter>>';  
      
      insert_in_log(v_sql);  
      [...]  
 end;

Me: Dev.... you are still using static code
Dev: Yes, but the query is in the log!
Me: But not EXACTLY what has been executed... where is the parameter?
Dev: here look, where it is written <<parameter>>

Top. 1 (Log, part 2)

Topic: Severity in the log
Instructions about task:

Me: Hi Dev, as you know we are using the severity of the log entries. We noticed that your code is writing too many entries at the same level. It does not matter if we use a log level as "debug" or as "production", it writes anyway too many entries. Can you reduce the number of entries in the log? Just assign properlyy the log severity.
Dev: Ok, all clear, reduce the number of entries in the log

Expectation (watch out the severity):

 procedure myProcedure() begin  
      [...]  
      query 1
      insert_in_log(query, high_severity);

      query 2
      insert_in_log(query, medium_severity);

      query 3
      insert_in_log(query, high_severity);

      query 4
      insert_in_log(query, low_severity);

 end;

Here is what I got (watch out the severity and the final delete):

 procedure myProcedure() begin  
      [...]  
      query 1
      insert_in_log(query, high_severity);

      query 2
      insert_in_log(query, high_severity);

      query 3
      insert_in_log(query, high_severity);

      query 4
      insert_in_log(query, high_severity);

      delete * from log;
      [...]  
 end;

Me: Dev.... ehm... why do you delete the entries from the log?
Dev: Com'on... you told me you wanted less entries in the log!

The pleasure of working with smart colleagues is wonderful.
Nothing pays more (professionally speaking) than the moment in which you manage to perform a good job, feeling a great synchrony with a smart colleague.
The moment in which you notice that it is enough to exchange two sentences in order to comunicate a very complicated concept and the security of being understood.

The possibility of meeting a smart colleague who enrich you can be very hard.

On the contrary, the possibility of meeting a dumb colleague may be very high! The colleague making his own life harder without any (logical) reason, the colleague who generates that piece of code that you will admire for ever.

We always have to deal with stupidity, in our every day life.
Is there any tool which can help us? Well, some years ago I read an inspiring book!

"Allegro ma non troppo" by Carlo M. Cipolla.

The book is about a scientific analysis of the human stupidity. It is proposed an illuminating mathematical model and 5 theorems.

If anybody out there is reading this blog, you know that this blog is meant to be short! I am therefore proposing here just the laws and the model. If you will be touched by such illumination, then I suggest you to read the book.

For the pictures I thank this website:
http://nicholasbordas.com/archives_posts/what-if-we-didnt-underestimate-stupidity